Addressing Your Spiritual Needs

Exercises & Practices

Is This Me?

These questions aren't a test. Just notice your internal response — what lands, what stings, what you want to skip over.

• Do you treat your spiritual life like a compartment — something you do on certain days or in certain settings — while the rest of your life runs on a separate track?

• Have you been so busy caring for others that you can't remember the last time you paid attention to your own soul?

• Do you know what your deepest desires actually are, or have they been buried so long you've stopped looking?

• Are there relationships in your life that consistently drain or damage you, but you've never adjusted the access they have to your heart?

• Do you feel guilty when you take time for your own spiritual health, as if caring for yourself means neglecting someone else?

• Have you shared your dreams or calling with someone who consistently criticizes or dismisses them — and kept going back?

• When someone asks "How are you really doing?" do you honestly not know the answer?

• Do you have good intentions about spiritual practices — prayer, reflection, connection — that never actually make it into your schedule?

Questions Worth Sitting With

These don't have quick answers. Sit with them. Let them do their work.

• If your spiritual life isn't a slice of the pie but the whole pie, what changes about how you approach Monday morning?

• What treasures of your heart — feelings, desires, talents, limits — have you stopped protecting? When did you stop?

• Of your three key relationships — with God, with others, and with yourself — which one have you been neglecting the longest? What has that cost you?

• If someone had been trampling your dreams for years and you kept giving them access, what would that tell you about what you believe you deserve?

• What would your life look like if you actually guarded your heart "with all diligence"? What would you stop tolerating? What would you start protecting?

• Is there a desire or calling you buried because someone told you it was impractical, selfish, or too late? Is it still there underneath?

• What's the difference between being spiritually active and being spiritually alive? Which one describes you right now?

• If you were a piece of property and you looked at the state of your fences, what would you see? Strong boundaries? Gaps? No fence at all?

Growth Practices

Pick one. Try it this week. Notice what happens.

Week 1: Notice. This week, pay attention to the moments when one of your "treasures" is activated — a strong feeling, a desire stirring, a limit being pressed, a talent being used or ignored. Don't try to change anything. Just notice. At the end of each day, briefly note what you observed. Pay special attention to: What feelings did I experience today? Did any of my limits get tested? Were any of my desires stirred or suppressed?

Week 2: Map. Draw three concentric circles on a piece of paper. Place the 1-3 people closest to your heart in the inner ring. Put the next 5-10 meaningful connections in the middle ring. Put the broader community in the outer ring. Now look at it: Are the right people in the right places? Is anyone in the inner circle who should be further out? Is anyone in the outer circles who should be closer? Where are the gardeners? Where are the tramplers?

Week 3: Build. Add one concrete structure to your week that creates space for your spiritual needs. Not a vague intention — something specific with a time, place, and boundary around it. A locked door and 20 minutes of silence in the morning. A weekly coffee with someone who nourishes your soul. A boundary that protects your evenings from work intrusion. Put it on the calendar. Protect it like you would a doctor's appointment.

Week 4: Protect. Have one conversation this week where you protect something that matters to you — a dream, a boundary, a feeling, a limit. This could be saying no to something that drains you, declining to share a tender aspiration with someone who has historically trampled it, or telling someone what you actually need instead of what you think they want to hear. Notice what it costs you. Notice what it gives you.

Scenario Cards

Scenario 1: The Hollow Servant Rachel has been part of her community for fifteen years. She organizes events, leads a group, volunteers weekly, and is always the first to show up when someone needs help. Everyone says she's incredible. But lately she feels hollow inside. She can't remember the last time she had a meaningful conversation about her own needs. She's exhausted, and when she's honest, a little resentful. She doesn't know who she'd even talk to about it — she's the one everyone else talks to.

What treasures of Rachel's heart are being neglected? What would it look like for her to start caring for her own spiritual needs without abandoning her commitments? What do you notice about your own instincts here?

Scenario 2: The Trampled Dream Marcus has always wanted to start a program that helps at-risk youth. It's been his passion since college. But every time he mentions it, his father tells him it's impractical. His wife worries about the financial risk. His closest friend says he should "just be grateful" for his stable job. Marcus hasn't talked about the dream in two years. Lately he notices he doesn't feel much of anything about it anymore.

What has happened to Marcus's desires? How have the people closest to him affected his spiritual life? What would "protecting his heart" look like in this situation — and what makes that hard?

Scenario 3: The Sunday-Only Faith Elena is successful in her career. She attends services most weekends, gives generously, and participates in a group. But when she's honest, her faith feels disconnected from her work life. The way she treats people at the office, the compromises she makes, the way she manages her stress — none of it feels "spiritual." She sees her faith as what happens on the weekend, and the rest of the week as something separate.

What does the idea that "all of life is spiritual" mean for Elena? What might integration — rather than compartmentalization — look like for her day-to-day? What's one small change that could begin to close the gap?

Journaling & Reflection

Looking Back

• Was there a time when your spiritual life felt more alive, more integrated? What was different then? What protected it — and what changed?

• Think of someone who has been a "gardener" in your life — someone who nourished your soul. What did they do? What did they see in you? What did being known by them give you permission to become?

• Is there a dream, desire, or calling that you stopped protecting somewhere along the way? Write about what happened. When did you stop guarding it? Who or what trampled it? Is there anything left to nurture?

Looking Inward

• When you think about the treasures of your heart — your feelings, attitudes, desires, talents, limits, choices — which ones feel the most neglected right now? What would it mean to pay attention to them?

• If someone asked you, "What do you really want?" would you be able to answer? Have your desires been buried, suppressed, or forgotten? What might it take to rediscover them?

• Write a letter to your heart. What would you say? What have you been ignoring? What do you need to acknowledge?

Looking Forward

• If you truly guarded your heart "with all diligence," what would change in how you spend your time? Your energy? Your relationships?

• Describe the version of you who has integrated spiritual care into daily life. What does that person's week look like? How do they protect their time? Their relationships? Their heart? What would it take to become that person?

• Finish this sentence and write for 5 minutes without stopping: "If I truly believed my spiritual needs mattered as much as everyone else's needs, I would..."